PlotSandy Patterson (Jason Bateman) is an account processor who gets a call from a woman (Melissa McCarthy) telling him that someone had attempted to steal his identity. She tells him about an identity protection service and asks him for his name, date of birth, and social security number. Sandy gives her his information, but little does he know that his identity is actually about to be stolen. At work, Sandy gets called in by his obnoxious boss, Harold Cornish (Jon Favreau), and told to prepare bonus checks for the company partners worth $1.2 million each. As Sandy goes to do so, he gets a phone call saying he has an appointment at a salon on Friday in Winter Park, Florida. Despite his confusion, as he is in Denver, he puts it out of his mind when he has a conversation with his co-worker, Daniel Casey (John Cho), who tells him to meet him in the parking lot. In the parking lot with other employees, Daniel informs Sandy that he and the others are tired of working for Cornish while he and t...
Sandy Patterson (Jason Bateman) is an account processor who gets a call from a woman (Melissa McCarthy) telling him that someone had attempted to steal his identity. She tells him about an identity protection service and asks him for his name, date of birth, and social security number. Sandy gives her his information, but little does he know that his identity is actually about to be stolen. At work, Sandy gets called in by his obnoxious boss, Harold Cornish (Jon Favreau), and told to prepare bonus checks for the company partners worth $1.2 million each. As Sandy goes to do so, he gets a phone call saying he has an appointment at a salon on Friday in Winter Park, Florida. Despite his confusion, as he is in Denver, he puts it out of his mind when he has a conversation with his co-worker, Daniel Casey (John Cho), who tells him to meet him in the parking lot. In the parking lot with other employees, Daniel informs Sandy that he and the others are tired of working for Cornish while he and the partners get all the money, so they propose to start their own firm, taking most of the company's clients in Denver with them. Daniel asks Sandy if he'll join them, telling him he is the best at what he does and that he would be paid $250,000 per year if he joined. Sandy then agrees to join Daniel in the new business and later tells his wife who is overjoyed at the news.
Meanwhile, Diana, the woman who had originally called Sandy, ran up a bill to over $2,400 on a fake credit card she had made using the information Sandy had given her, including buying jewelry, a jet ski, and drinks for everyone at a bar in Winter Park, before getting arrested for drunkenly assaulting the bartender with a punch to the throat. The next day Sandy tries to get gas using his real credit card, but his card is declined and the gas station clerk cuts it up. He calls the credit card company and is told he's spent a lot of money in Florida. As this happens, he gets arrested. At the same time in Florida, Diana continues splurging with Sandy's money. At a police station, Detective Reilly (Morris Chestnut) tells Sandy that he missed a court date in Florida for assault. They pull up a mug shot of Diana from her arrest and determine she's stolen Sandy's identity. It gets worse at work when Daniel says cops are asking about him possessing drugs. Reilly and other cops show up and say a card with Sandy's name was used to buy drugs from a man named Paolo (Jonathan Banks). When told they can't do anything unless the identity thief was standing there in Denver with them, Sandy offers to go on his own, bring her there and get her to talk to Daniel to clear his name. Sandy's wife, Trish (Amanda Peet), finds out about the situation and knows Sandy's taking a risk, but he assures her he'll get the job done.
Sandy then travels to Winter Park where finds Diana at the salon and follows her. After he confronts her on the highway, she steals his rental car and leaves him with her now totaled Fiat (but takes the keys). After a call from his wife telling him that a debt collection company was looking for him for non-payment for the Fiat, he finds her address in the glove compartment and goes to Diana's house, which is full of merchandise and other stolen credit cards. The pair scuffle and Sandy attempts to handcuff her. Before Sandy can cuff her, two criminals named Marisol and Julian (Génesis Rodríguez and T.I.) are pounding at the door because Diana gave Paolo some bad credit cards. Marisol and Julian shoot the door open, but Sandy and Diana manage to escape out the back door.
Sandy tells Diana about his plan to redeem his name and Diana agrees to go along with him. Meanwhile, a skiptracer (Robert Patrick) is dispatched to track down Diana to obtain a substantial bounty. On the road, Diana reminds Sandy that the people at the airport would have an issue with both of their ID's reading "Sandy Bigelow Patterson" with the same birthdate, so flying back is out of the question and Sandy decides to get them back to Denver by driving. After traveling through several states, the skiptracer catches up to the pair and captures Diana. A chase ensues and she knocks him unconscious, and Sandy rams his van off the road. The van spears off the road and rolls over, but Diana survives with only a bloody nose despite standing up at the time of the accident. After the rental car is then destroyed when hit by a semi-trailer, they flee in the skiptracer's van with him tied with duct tape in the back, but it overheats on the road. They end up walking and almost stop to rest in the woods, but they encounter several snakes, one of which ends up in Sandy's pants, which he takes off and throws away. Another snake bites Sandy's neck and Diana accidentally knocks him unconscious while trying to beat the snake with a stick from their camp fire.
Sandy wakes up at a bus station; Diana says she carried him until she flagged down a truck to take them there. The next bus to Denver isn't due for three days. Sandy then remembers that he has some emergency money in his socks and buys a cheap car. When they stop for gas and realize they need more money, the two of them sneak into Sandy's old accounting firm with Sandy playing Cornish and coax an accounts processor into giving them access into restricted files, where they steal Cornish's identity to create new credit cards (the accounts processor discovers the scam but arrives too late to stop them). Meanwhile, the skiptracer goes to the bus station and threatens the employee unless he tells him where to find Diana. He then gets shot by Marisol who, along with Julian, has been tracking the pair throughout their journey. Having overheard the skiptracer's conversation they continue to pursue Sandy and Diana. Sandy and Diana finally arrive in St. Louis and stop at a hotel. Diana gets a makeover and has dinner with Sandy. Things get heated when he asks Diana what her real name is, but she admits she doesn't know it. She cries as the accounts processor comes in with cops, who arrest Sandy and Diana. Diana manages to un-cuff herself in the back of the police car, and then breaks the back windshield and escapes with Sandy. The skiptracer, who had captured Marisol and Julian by shooting them in the foot and locking them up in his trunk, eventually finds Diana and Sandy on the highway mid-escape, and hits Diana with his car, sending her flying behind it. Although the skiptracer ends up colliding his car with the cops, prompting a horde of police to arrest him, Julian and Marisol. After getting hit by the car, Sandy comes to her aid, but Diana comes to and defensively strikes Sandy in the throat. Diana and Sandy eventually get home, where Diana has dinner with Sandy's family and reconciles with them.
The next morning, Sandy is prepared to tell Diana that he'll go to work alone (and not turn her in), but she's gone. She left a note saying sorry. He goes into work, preparing to quit, but Daniel shows him that Diana is meeting with the police in an office. Detective Reilly tells Sandy he is no longer part of the investigation and Diana is taken away in cuffs. Before she leaves, Sandy asks her why, and Diana says she knew he wouldn't turn her in, but it was the right thing for her to do it herself. One year later, Sandy is celebrating another birthday, this time with his third kid joining them. The family goes to visit Diana in prison, where Sandy presents Diana with a birth certificate of hers that reveals that Diana's true name is Dawn Budgie (which Diana thinks is a "terrible fucking name"). Diana hugs Sandy and begins to walk away, until an officer tells her "Back in your cage, bitch", prompting Diana to strike her in the throat. Another guard tazes Diana in the back. Diana falls, but recovers seconds later. She then gets up, apologizes to the guard she struck, and walks back to go to her cell. The camera takes one more shocked look from Sandy, as he walks away.
This article uses material from the Wikipedia article "Identity_Thief", which is released under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share-Alike License 3.0